I can’t go any longer not publicly weblogging my lament of the total destruction of 1up.com and EGM, and the subsequent partial buyout of 1up.com by ass-publisher UGO. Honestly, check their website at your own risk. It might make you hate media a little bit more. The more farewell blogs I read on the site by former staff, the sadder it makes me for all those great writers and interesting people that lost their jobs, the madder it makes me at Ziff-Davis for being weak-willed white-dwarfed money-grubbing silly nannies and fucking up the “most important gaming magazine of the last 20 years,” and the clearer my understanding becomes of the big picture: the economy.
It’s tragic that I have to witness an international depression claim jobs that affect me directly (though not financially). I don’t think it’s true that we’re entering the 2nd Great Depression: as you can see by the government-aided assistance of gi-gan-tic wallstreet companies, many of the world’s economies are safeguarded from total destruction like in the 1930s by reserve funds and so on. But I now have a concrete example of negative personal effects of a weakened economy, and it’s really wild to me. To consider that the adult world–I mean business and such–exists as a bunch of systems that are kept stable by the entire fucking earth and millions and millions of people in it, yet can still fuck up and hurt people, is shocking for a budding adult like me!
Anyway, I’ll miss EGM, an excellent magazine to which I subscribed for a few years; but that doesn’t really show how much I’ll miss it. I’ve read lots of publications, and I’m about the trillionth person to say this but, EGM had the most heart. It’s art direction was incredible after Mielke came in as EIC. Newcomers like Nick Suttner and Gallegos were great personalities and great writers. 1up’s look has always been slick–the facebook to ign’s myspace browser vomit–and the staff there are also entertaining writers. The web of podcasts (which is always at the top of the screen in the iTunes store, the reason in my heart being because they fucking rock and the real reason being sponsored podcasts are listed alphabetically and 1up is so alphabetic it’s numeric), meshed together all facets of gaming, and I loved everything I heard. Garnett Lee just posted today that 1up Yours will continue, but with a different name, which leaves Retronauts the last relic of a once-great podcast army. Oh well. All the fired kids are moving on and beginning to make money, so that’s good! We’ll see what happens with the new 1up. Well, I will.
What’s that? What have I been playing? Hm. Glad you asked.
I finally took a proper trip to Osaka’s Den Den Town, a famous district in Kansai of electronics stores (which means computers, games, anime, and porn), a couple weeks ago, in search of items unattainable in the states. I mean, it’s why I’m here in Japan, ladies and gentlemen.
I explained last time that Ebisucho, the precise area of Osaka nicknamed Den Den Town, gets gritty at night. Well, it is much nicer during the day, although still overcrowded and smelly. But hey, that’s Osaka. A lot of the stores are worthless if you don’t like collecting old-ass telephones, crummy old recliners, and Gundam figurines, but the few video game stores I checked were just beautiful. I truly freaked out a bit when I entered the first old-school game store I came across from the station exit.
I was greeted by several TVs (CRT, of course!) playing games like Super Mario World, Super Mario World 2: Yoshi’s Island, and so on. Once I stepped inside the shop, a sale bin blocked my progress and was filled with my ultimate goal of the day: Super Famicoms and Super Famicom games. It was that easy. I couldn’t believe it. On top of that, after I glanced at the 3000 yen price sticker, I felt like an ass for wasting so many hours shopping for an import system on ebay for unreasonable amounts of money. Anyway, what was even better was that I turned to a display case on my left to find Famicoms and old-school gaming peripherals and periphernalia. Then I glanced back at the sale bit to see used Japanese Dreamcasts for cheap, next to Japanese Saturns for cheap. I don’t have a single memory of even seeing a Saturn in my life. As a young gamer, I played whatever I knew about, which was what my classmates talked about or what I saw on Power Rangers commercial breaks. So, while I know it’s weird because I kept up with my consoles and games back in the day, but I totally totally skipped a generation of Sega. And here it was, like Fry’s dog on his old stoop, waiting for me all this time. Am I thinking about buying one? Well, is the Pope Catholic?
Moving on, this sale bin was next to the packed, and admittedly ugly, game shelves. I couldn’t believe all the games I saw there. I would use the word endless but…oh okay, endless rows of games lay before me. I say endless because if I were to sit down (which I ended up doing at one point) and drew out each game to see the pictures on the cover of the case or cartridge and translate the title, I would’ve run out of time. This was unfortunate, really, because I only realized after I arrived in Den Den Town that I hadn’t done enough research on what classic games I should buy. I had a vague list of what I knew, including specific titles, developers, and genres, but that wasn’t enough. In a store like that, you really must know what you want, or you’ll wander around until the store closes. It would be like Wander finding the next Colossus without his sword to converge light rays in the right direction.
I don’t even remember the name of that first store, because it wasn’t flashy or as important as the second one, Super Potato. Oh my god I went to a Super Potato. I used to watch videos of people walking around inside the Super Potato in Tokyo. This was a dream. And I was mostly pleased with the selection and price here, too. There are two floors in this branch, the bottom being newer generations (PS2 and beyond) and the upper floor being old games and consoles. I saw some really really great stuff there when I wasn’t being smushed by the 10 other people up there. Yes, I realize that’s not a lot of people, but the shit was just that packed in on the second floor. Nearly every game I could think of possibly wanting to play was there, excepting Klonoa, Einhander, a few Mega Man games, and a couple shooters. But in the place of those games were games I didn’t even know I wanted to play! Well, I admit I don’t want to play Klonoa Volleyball ever, but there was some great shit there I had forgotten about or that just looked interesting. However, there were way too many derby games, soccer games, and pro wrestling games. (Fuck. My stomach hurts when I think about the first and last genres here and how positively whored out they’ve become in Japan.) But they had a copy of The Typing of the Dead for Dreamcast still in the freaking box, which was awesome, not to mention countless WonderSwans, the original console Mr. Driller, Gunstar Heroes, Dynamite Headdy, mint boxed copies of Chrono Trigger, Metal Gear for Famicom; man, the list goes on and on.
Anywho, I visited a Big Tiger and maybe one more old-school games retailer in Osaka that day, at which I found some great stuff. But just as cool was the atmosphere of these places. TVs everywhere playing demos of old Final Fantasy games and Mario games, 80s puzzle game music blasting through speakers, old game ads and cardboard cutouts of famous characters actually taking up most of the staircase in some places, and…oh yeah, it’s Japan, so there were totally superfluous strobe lights flashing in my eyes as I tried to see the used PS2 games.
That’s a lot of ado, so here’s what I’ve been playing.
Here’s my very own Super Famicom, yellowed more than the picture might show by the incessant cigarette smoke exhaled by Japanese everywhere in the 90s, with the unquestionably classic Super Metroid–a game I’ve actually never played. I’ve been playing for several hours now, and I’m having a lot of fun. Samus is frequently powered up with capacity, weapons, and suit upgrades; the platforming is great, and the maps are just maze-y enough.
You’ll notice the differences between the Japanese Super Famicom and your old Super Nintendo. But my favorite part of the Japanese hardware for me has to be the colored A, B, X, and Y buttons. It’s so incredibly bright, which is kind of a Japanese way to do gaming, if you think about it. And to think that they were dulled to look like 4 advil tablets for Americans makes these buttons pictured here even brighter! You know, I’m all for being happy 
Here are the other three Super Famicom purchases I made at Super Potato. Super R-Type is a very old shooter (1991) that I got because I remember playing it and dying immediately at my friend’s house when I was young. Also, I’m becoming obsessed with shmups these days in the same way I’m obsessed with survival horror games: I love them and think about them all the time and want to play every one ever made, even though I’ve played like, one at most. But this one is great, actually, the weapons are wild; so wild that the game enters an eternal state of uberlag after 2/3 of the way through level 1. It’s hilarious. And it’s frustratingly difficult too. I assume that’s the way a shooter should be–if you didn’t die over and over, being forced to master the mechanics and level design, the game would be too short and not rewarding. But it’s just funny that my ship is so weak that it can’t be touched by ANYTHING or it immediately explodes; and that I’m mercilessly returned all the way to the beginning of the stage when I die–no apologies, no encouragement, not even a special song. O old school games!
You can see Final Fantasy VI there as well. I already own the PSX remake in Anthology, but it’s not in Japanese, and it has load times. Oh, and thanks to a New Year’s special, this classic RPG was a fucking dollar. I just couldn’t pass it up. I played the intro quickly and it was really intriguing. I can’t wait to experience 16-bit Final Fantasy goodness. Also pictured: another classic RPG for a dollar, Dragon Quest V.
This is the one Greg will definitely be mad at me for having (and I’m sure happy at the same time!). I actually just kind of almost bumped into the last controller Super Potato had unexpectedly. Once I saw it, I just couldn’t pass it up. As you can see, the controller is disgustingly tiny compared to the arcade buttons, so playing at home is basically reading practice, not muscle practice. But I’m totally okay with that. I’m having a lot of fun with it in my dorm. Pop’n Music 8 has a really good track list and a lot of fun steps. I’m slowly learning 9-button craziness! Soon enough, Greg. Don’t fret.
That was actually the total extent of items purchased that day in Den Den Town, which reached a total of $100. I’m happy, and I’m surprised I didn’t go overboard. But the thing is, I’ve always been a collector of games with a giant-to-begin-with-and-always-growing pile of shame. I mean, I’ve just started gaming in Japan in recent weeks, and I already have a healthy library. So, to make this blog even longer, I’m gonna show you the rest of the games I have here. This might be a good idea to go get something to eat, or just close the browser altogether and come back later.
Cool, you’re back. Or…still here.
For PS2 I’ve got: Devil May Cry 3, because I loved Ninja Gaiden and heard from the guys over at DSGA that DMC3 is really great; Final Fantasy X because it’s been a dream of mine to play through my favorite game of all time in Japanese for years; Grandia III because it looks pretty, was about 7 dollars, and I never even heard of it coming out in America; Rei~Shisei no Koe~ (Fatal Frame 3) because I’m starting my quest to play every survival horror game I can find (it’s good so far!); Ratchet & Clank because I bought a super old used PS2 bundle, and this was the bundled game (I played it through to completion because I don’t mind playing dated games because it expands my knowledge of games in general–I have a better idea of where games are coming from and how they’ve evolved and such–but it was fun in spite of its age); and Rez, which I’ve already talked about (oh yeah, I played Area 5 again the other day, and it’s still awesome).
Here we have my modest DS collection: Ouendan 2, Rhythm Heaven Gold, and Chrono Trigger. Ouendan 2 has great unique gameplay, and, while not super hard, is insanely more challenging than Elite Beat Agents. I’m very happy about that. Rhythm Tengoku Gold has been infesting my DS now since I got it for Christmas because I love it. The gameplay is fun, the art is hilarious, and songs are actually good! The Idol song? And the Karate-Ka song? And, like, all the remix songs? Man! But I must say, it should have been a much harder game, being a music game made in Japan. Chrono Trigger is great so far. The Japanese is juuust out of my league, so I’m well understanding a lot of the dialogue, and playing it on the go is always a neat retro experience.
Hahahaha, oh goodness. I laugh whenever I see these games. This is my Japanese Playstation collection so far. Listen to Retronauts podcast episode 29 to learn about D, or Wikipedia it, or forget you ever saw it. In any case, it’s a scary first-person adventure lauded by some and hated by most, and I just had to have it when I saw it sitting on a low shelf in a brand new electronics store. It was mythified by a journalist I like, so I just couldn’t pass it up (especially because it cost around 4 dollars). D No Shokutaku means D’s Dinner Table, which is funny because the game on its right, Za Shinri Geemu (The Psychology Game) also depicts a shittily rendered dinner scene with early and disgusting PSX graphics. I, like probably 99.99% of the world’s population, had naturally never ever heard of this game when I saw it in a rather sketchy game store underneat the train tracks in Sannomiya, but I knew it was meant to be scary, so I had to get it (price tag: 240 yen). Plus, I don’t know why, but lately I’ve been really attracted by awfully fake, bland 3D graphics of yore, and this…prisoner guy, or whatever the hell, eating something mysterious with his mouth open, in shock, looks so cool to me. And it’s made cooler by its awful quality. So when I picked the game up, considering if I’d actually spend the money to buy it, I turned the case around, where I saw two eyes staring at me through blackness, and the words “In the midst of fear, I saw my true self,” I didn’t hesitate to scoop this gem right up! It’s so Japanese! (Oh and by the way, the fucking gameplay manual spoils what’s on the plate, which turns out to be–surprise!–a human heart.) It turns out it’s not really a game, but a serious of short scary stories in which you can choose how the main character of the stories reacts to certain situations in the stories (which I assumed because of the age and terrible quality of the game don’t influence a damn thing). The backgrounds change with each paragraph displayed, being an open door, or a dim hallway or something, and unfortunately annoying music plays too. But I’m not disappointed by the purchase, I’m excited about translating the stories and really getting to know what a bad game is like. (Haha, what if it’s like incredible underappreciated literature with beautiful and shocking twists?…yeah right).
So that’s what my gaming life is looking like these days. I’m glad I haven’t put it on hold. I was deeply worried I might miss out on a year’s worth of experience by being busy traveling and studying, but I’m working on creating free time for my favorite hobby. I can’t play any new games, but being separated from that possibility is helping me build my knowledge of older generations before I’m consumed by the myriad masterpieces of the new generations. Let me know how your game life is going, if at all. And I want to say once again that I appreciate all the love I’m getting in my comments. You guys are great friends, and you’re still the greatest people on earth that I’ve ever known–a record that’s been running since early high school. So thanks again.
